Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (2011) HD Download

 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (2011)

An expensive and average film without much reason or mystery

Robert Downey Jr., Noomi Rapace and Jude Law in Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
Photo: Warner Bros.

I was lukewarm on the first Sherlock Holmes feature. I saw it as a sign Robert Downey Jr. was spreading himself a little too thin and the film itself didn't hold much interest as it devolved into a bloated spectacle of computer-generated sets and a comedic routine that never got past the opening act. So with muted expectations I stepped into Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows, hoping the reveal of Holmes' iconic nemesis Professor Moriarty would spice things up a bit. Unfortunately, this turns into more of the same with only slight variations and a complete absence of mystery making for a film you are left waiting for it to end rather than anticipating what is to come.
Utilizing the oft-used terrorist plot, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows features the intelligent and respected Professor Moriarty (Jared Harris) as he sets his sights on starting a war between France and Germany through the use of a few well-placed bombings. Having anonymously become a major weapons manufacturer it's his way of making large sums of money at the expense of others. We've seen this in a countless number of films and to let the audience in on the mystery without even offering up an hour's worth of clues is just lame.

With that comes the continued play on the Lethal Weapon-esque partnership between Holmes and Watson, a relationship I felt was the absolute best thing to come out of the first film, but now, after only two films, it has already run its course and is too over-the-top to take it seriously, even as a farce. Holmes is a mad-genius of an investigator and Watson... Well, Watson just seems to be trying to stay alive throughout the film's two hour running time.
Rachel McAdams returns as Irene Adler for only a short amount of screen time, as the Game of Shadows female protagonist is played by Noomi Rapace, who is taking advantage of her rise in fame as the lead in the Swedish adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo to Hollywood, though she is merely a set piece here as the Gypsy fortune-teller, Sim. Her part of the story is to play the third wheel as her brother's involvement in Moriarty's plan becomes something of a sideshow mystery that is less than satisfying.

I was happy to see the absence of the high-wire set pieces, but this time around it's replaced with a lengthy train sequence that's more action-filler than an integral part of the plot. The stakes are low and if you've seen a single trailer for this film you will be well ahead of the action to the point you'll be yawning much of the way through.
Director Guy Ritchie found a way to inject a little bit of ingenuity into slow motion fight sequences in the first Sherlock, playing them out first in Holmes' mind as he prepared his plan of punch and counter-punch. The same technique is used here only with a bit of a twist, which was a welcome surprise the first time it happened, but it quickly became redundant.
To search for outstanding positives in A Game of Shadows is a stretch as this is merely an expensive and average film that felt like it was more interested in remaining just safe enough for PG-13 audiences while only showing hints of real menace that would have turned its villain into something more interesting.

Harris is quite good as Moriarty in that you believe he's got a sadistic side to him beyond his hands-off bombings. He's also smart and, as one brief comment informs us, well-trained in hand-to-hand combat. As a result, the film is best when Moriarty and Sherlock are left to match wits, but this only comes along after we've been forced to endure several repetitive asides that all seem derivative of the first film and so many other films that follow similar plot patterns and feature a pair of buddy cops as the leads.
Imagination has essentially been replaced with dollar bills as Downey Jr. plays 19th Century's Detective Jack Sparrow with a touch of Ethan Hunt's penchant for disguises and the madcap behavior of Martin Riggs. When you're doing nothing more than mining territory already covered you're likely to leave the audience disinterested, which was exactly the case for me with Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows.

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Wrath of the Titans (2012) HD Download

Wrath of the Titans (2012)

Cast & Crew

Director : Jonathan Liebesman
Producer : Basil Iwanyk, Polly Johnsen,
Screenwriter : Dan Mazeau, David Johnson,
Starring : Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Rosamund Pike, Toby Kebbell, Ralph Fiennes, Edgar Ramirez, Bill Nighy, John Bell, Danny Huston,

While this sequel is just as loud and chaotic as 2010's Clash of the Titans remake, it's also considerably more fun due to some exhilarating action and a refreshing sense of humour. It also looks amazing in 3D on an Imax screen.

 

Years later, the now-widowed hero Perseus (Worthington) is trying to live as an anonymous fisherman with his pre-teen son Helius (Bell). Then he hears about stirrings of a coming calamity. Indeed, his father Zeus (Neeson) has been kidnapped by Hades (Fiennes) and Ares (Ramirez) as pat of a plan to release Zeus and Hades' evil father Kronos from the underworld. So Perseus teams up with Queen Andromeda (Pike) and rogue demigod Agenor (Kebbell), son of Poseidon (Huston), to rescue his father and stop his brother, uncle and grandfather.

Yes, this is one seriously dysfunctional family, as four generations of men set out to either destroy the world or save it. To be honest, it's never clear why Hades and Ares are so hellbent, as it were, on cataclysmic destruction, but at least this also allows for changing alliances as the story progresses. Not that there's much story, really, as the plot essentially just links a series of action set-pieces.
Fortunately, most of these sequences are entertaining enough to keep us gripped. Highlights include a rather fabulous dragon attack and a desperate, full-on fight with cyclops-giants in a forest. Less convincing are a convoluted underworld rescue-battle and the climactic assault on the volcano-sized Kronos, who rains down fire and destruction rather selectively. (There's also the problem of how the filmmakers can top Kronos in the probable sequel.)

Along the way, there are some refreshing moments of deranged humour, mainly in Kebbell's snarky dialog, Pike's sharp glances and a particularly colourful turn by Nighy (as super-spear smelter Hephaestus). But as the story progresses, there's more than a whiff of Lord of the Rings (the fires of Mount Doom, plus some pointless two-torsoed Orc-a-likes), Harry Potter (the three-pronged Deathly Hallows) and even Star Wars (all that father-son angst). But filmmaker Liebesman keeps things moving briskly, wowing us with so much eye-candy that we just sit back and enjoy the rickety ride for what it is.

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The Amazing Spider-Man (2012) HD Download

The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)

It's been a mere five years since Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy came to a close, but Columbia Pictures and Marvel have teamed up to reboot the franchise, this time with Mark Webb (500 Days of Summer) at the helm. The Amazing Spider-Man is a darker take on the franchise; while it's still very good, it suffers from an inconsistent tone and a plot that lacks proper focus.

It's been a mere five years since Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy came to a close, but Columbia Pictures and Marvel have teamed up to reboot the franchise, this time with Mark Webb (500 Days of Summer) at the helm. The Amazing Spider-Man is a darker take on the franchise; while it's still very good, it suffers from an inconsistent tone and a plot that lacks proper focus.

This reboot begins with the same teenage high school student, Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield), whom we all know and love. A visit to Oscorp Labs causes Peter to be bitten by a genetically altered spider, which leaves him with super powers and a new Spider-Man alter ego.
Yes, it's the same origin story you've heard before, and the changes to the formula really don't switch things up all that much. Peter has trouble with his newfound strength, and constantly finds himself breaking doors, computers, and basketball hoops as he attempts to balance all the aspects of his new life.

I guess these scenes are provided as comic relief, but none of them work very well at all. These over-the-top comical moments don't mesh well with the darker plot, which otherwise succeeds at bringing out a more human side to the character.
The death of Peter's uncle, Ben Parker (Martin Sheen), may not have the same impact it had in the 2002 Sam Raimi film, but it does effectively serve to send Peter on a quest for revenge. The new vigilante known as Spider-Man finds an enemy in the NYPD's police commissioner, George Stacy (Denis Leary), who also happens to be the father of Peter's crush, Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone).
The relationship between Garfield and Stone is one of the more compelling aspects of the film, made all the better by Leary taking the role of over-protective father. The dynamic among these three characters serves to give The Amazing Spider-Man that grounding in reality it so desperately wanted to achieve.

I think it's in the love story angle that director Mark Webb, who is no stranger to romantic comedies, really shines. The teenage love of Gwen Stacey and Peter Parker is one of the most effective romances seen in any superhero movie, and Webb's steady hand is largely responsible for making it work so very well.

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Snow White and the Huntsman (2012) HD Download

Snow White and the Huntsman (2012) 

Strange is a movie that immediately establishes its dramatic stakes but spends the rest of the film waiting for the main characters to actually take seemingly obvious action.  But such is the case with Rupert Sander's big-budget Snow White reinvention.  While the idea of retelling Snow White on a more epic scale with bits and pieces from Lord of the Rings thrown in isn't the most inspired idea (Snow White: A Tale of Terror went the Gothic horror route over a decade ago), there remain elements for a primal hero's adventure with a dash of feminist subtext thrown in for good measure.  But the picture seems to go out of its way to dismiss or ignore what shows promise while aimlessly wandering around in a literal and metaphorical dark forest waiting for its inevitable action climax to occur.  It fails at least partially because it strands its lead characters with nowhere to go while stranding its lead heroine with nothing to do. 

The film's strongest section is in its initial reel, which gravely recounts how the cunning and magical Ravenna (Charlize Theron) came to power through seduction and murder.  Theron is obviously having a grand time as the wicked queen, and her establishing cruelty quickly gets us on Snow White's (Kristen Stewart) side.  The film flirts with social relevance by giving her a tragic and sympathetic back-story that stems from the all-too familiar idea that a woman's youth and beauty is both her greatest weapon and her only real currency in a male-dominated world.  It's a potent theme that is sadly all-but forgotten and rendered irrelevant after the first act.  In fact, once Snow White narrowly escapes death and finds herself in the dark forest, she and the film both fall into a sleep of sorts.  Oh sure there is temporary humor and energy in Chris Hemsworth's somewhat robust turn as a reluctant hunter sent into the woods to snatch the princess under false pretenses.  But once Snow White escapes, the movie's narrative stops dead for a good 60-75 minutes with nothing of note to justify our interest.

There is one compelling detour, involving a village of widowed/orphaned women who have literally scarred themselves in order to protect themselves from the queen's beauty-obsessed wrath, but it's over in a flash and the film is poorer for its brevity.  Like John Carter from a few months back, this film quickly establishes the core conflict and sits on its butt for most of the running time until our passive hero finally decides to do something about it. And like that mega-budget fantasy film, what happens prior to the big pay off isn't very entertaining and the actual pay off is pretty underwhelming.  Despite the promise of big-scale epic action, Sanders shoots most of the film in that too-close, too-choppy style that renders much of it hard to follow (there is literally one action beat that suggests that Hemsworth is felled by a phantom punch).  The would-be grand finale is merely a few beats of mostly nameless/faceless soldiers bloodlessly hacking at each other before the main protagonists and antagonists face off.  The film runs over two hours and at least 30 minutes of that is spent on tangents that exist only because of fidelity to the would-be source material.  Despite being played by (among others) Bob Hoskins, Ray Winstone, and Toby Jones, the dwarfs serve no purpose in the overall story and are nothing but a distraction.  Ditto the protracted third-act (...minor spoiler...) sequence involving the whole poison apple and sleeping princess cliche.  Come what may, at least Mirror Mirror knew to ditch that unnecessary diversion.
Snow White herself is a shockingly hollow character who is given no real personality and no character arc of her own.  Say what you will about Lily Collins's flat star turn back in March, but her Snow White actually discovered the queen's cruelty and slowly learned about the injustices that needed to be righted.  No such luck here. Snow White has no character arc, no discernible personality traits, and not a trace of anything that would merit our sympathy other than a tragic childhood and that fact that she's physically attractive, which is ironic considering the initial moralizing. Kristen Stewart has shockingly little to do for the first 100 minutes of the film, and about as much dialogue as routinely given to a Charles Bronson character.  I'm generally a fan of Stewart's, previously saluting her turns in Into the Wild and Adventureland among others while even enjoying her underrated initial turn as Bella Swan in the first Twilight.  But this is a lifeless and artless performance, and it frankly it would bad enough to hurt her career as a big-studio lead if she seemingly had any interest in such a thing (she's allegedly quite good in On the Road).

Charlize Theron is terrific when she's onscreen, but she pretty much exits the film after the first 40 minutes and her screen-time after that amounts to a cameo.  Sam Claflin is just as dull here as he was in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides and is quickly becoming the go-to actor for boring boy-ish love interests.  On a slight digression, the film never explains why he can morally justify teaming up with the bad guys in order to also track down Snow White, turning a blind eye as innocents are murdered in front of him.  Sam Spruell is somewhat engaging as the queen's loyal brother (he's the villain that actually engages in onscreen action as opposed to sitting in the castle), with his best moment being a blink-and-you-miss it moment that implies that his relationship with the queen may be incestuous.
We have a flat and lifeless narrative punctuated by unimpressive and choppy action, a fascinating feminist subtext that is dropped in favor of generic heroics. All of this is rounded out by interesting characters who aren't onscreen enough and uninteresting characters that dominate the latter 2/3 of the film. Snow White and the Huntsman is a failure both as a reinvention and a movie. It earns points for production value, Theron and Hemsworths' respective star turns, and for a promising initial reel that makes promises the film can't keep.  But like John Carter, Snow White and the Huntsman goes nowhere and takes forever to get there.  Just because it makes an effort to be a real movie doesn't justify its failure as a quality film.

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The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011) HD Download

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)

"What is hidden in the snow comes forth in the thaw." That's the gloriously intense tagline on the poster for The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and oh what a tangled web is revealed on the windswept Hedeby Island, home of the wealthy industrial Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer) and his fractious family. The murder investigation that takes place there, led by disgraced journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig) and his testy punk assistant Lisbeth Salander (Rooney Mara), makes up the twisty mystery plot that engaged millions of audiences in Stieg Larsson's original novel. But adapting the story with his usual flair for the dramatic and dark, David Fincher draws out themes and ideas that were barely present in the novel, creating a film that's less about the lugubrious story than the fascinating characters who inhabit it. It's a vast improvement on the source material, a brooding and gripping mystery that's captivating even if you know exactly how the story turns out.

Odds are a lot of audiences do know the story-- Larsson's novel is an enormous bestseller, and Fincher and screenwriter Steven Zaillian are careful to stick to the basic points of the novel, while also streamlining and making the story smarter. We follow our two heroes on parallel, totally separate tracks for nearly half the film, as Blomkvist suffers the fallout of his trial for libel and reluctantly travels up to Hedeby to accept an unusual assignment from Vanger, who 40 years later still obsesses over the unsolved murder of his niece Harriet. There's reason to suspect someone in the family did it, and as Blomkvist gets more tangled in the Vanger clan the story flips between him and Salander, a private investigator and hacker assigned at first to do a background check on Blomkvist before he was hired by Vanger. That's the only connection between the characters for a long time, as Salander deals in her own violent way with her abusive legal guardian and Blomkvist is isolated on Hedeby; by they meet, Craig and Mara have so expertly developed their characters that it feels like a head-on collision.

Larsson's original narrative is convoluted and often meandering, getting tangled in the intricacies of the Swedish legal system one moment and making room for about four different conclusions, none as explosive and dramatic as the moment when Blomkvist and Salander find their man. Zaillian and Fincher are only able to improve it so much, and there are still moments when the narrative seems to jet off after unnecessary tangents or linger too long on a minor point; and yet, when dealing with the central characters, Fincher brings laserlike focus and attention to detail. In one deft edit Fincher draws a comparison between Salander, a ward of the state who dresses in dingy black clothing to mask her physical weakness and battered soul, and Harriet Vanger, a girl of privilege who is still searched for 40 years after her disappearance. Tiny bits of body language immediately establish Blomkvist's affair with his editor Erika Berger (Robin Wright), and then set it up in stark contrast to his warming relationship with Salander. Even early scenes in which Blomkvist reluctantly takes in a stray cat have a powerful payoff-- ever meticulous, Fincher wastes not a moment in his long two and a half hour film.

Though there are no weak links in the enormous cast, and Plummer does especially sly work as Vanger, Rooney Mara's blazing, uncompromising performance is the film's center, practically its reason to exist. In the novel Salander was often seen from the perspective of a man, alien and fascinating and unknowable, but Fincher and Mara allow Salander to stand utterly on her own. Eyebrows bleached blond, hair jet black and scowling constantly, Salander has deliberately modeled herself as the opposite of the feminine ideal, and though Mara digs into her humanity and even sensuality, she never lets down Salander's guard for the sake of the audience sympathy. She and Craig build a rapport that buoys the film through its dark and occasionally exhausting plot, but it's Mara's steely gaze and clipped delivery that linger long after the movie is through.

As the third take on the story in as many years, Fincher's The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo doesn't reinvent the tricky narrative, and at heart is a pulpy mystery story jazzed up with Swedish chill and a punk's devotion to the grim and grotesque. It's probably the best version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo we could ask for-- Fincher is joined by frequent collaborators like cinematographer Jeff Cronenweth and composers Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross, all of them working in perfect concert. While the movie is still a little hampered by a narrative that can't be tamed, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo a bracing and completely absorbing thriller, hopefully just the beginning of a trilogy that's just as ferocious throughout. 

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The Hobbit An Unexpected Journey 2012 HD Download

The Hobbit An Unexpected Journey 2012

FILM REVIEW: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)

REVIEW SUMMARY: Plodding, ponderous, and ultimately pretentious, Peter Jackson’s prequel to The Lord of the Rings trilogy never reaches its predecessor’s epic heights.
MY RATING:
BRIEF SYNOPSIS: Gandalf the Gray and a gathering of Dwarves enlist Hobbit Bilbo Baggins into a quest to reclaim treasure stolen by the dragon Smaug.
MY REVIEW:
PROS: Breathtaking realization of the riddle scene and the goblin kingdom beneath the Misty Mountains; impressive rendering of goblins, Gollum, and the brief glimpse of Smaug.
CONS: Lumberingly paced; script stretching the source material to excruciating lengths; Peter Jackson’s restless yet surprisingly murky direction; 48 frames-per-second resolution giving the entire movie a cheesy look.

They’ve made a mistake.  Several, actually.  Though clogged with too many songs and meals, J. R. R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit, or There and Back Again benefits from a deft touch and, despite occasional lapses, an elegance in its telling, even when the twee narrative spills into the annoyingly cute.  While it occasionally touches on big themes, it recounts the adventures of the Hobbit Bilbo Baggins, the wizard Gandalf the Grey, and a band of Dwarves out to reclaim familial treasure from the Dragon Smaug in a way that never bogs down.  Perhaps it lacks the epic sweep of The Lord of the Rings, but its relatively simple quest makes it more immediate and, in a way, more engaging.

The Hobbit makes for a breezy, charming, diverting tale, and so should make for a breezy, charming, diverting movie.  Certainly it seems in good hands.  Peter Jackson, who brought Middle Earth and its denizens to life in the Lord of the Rings trilogy nine years ago, returns to helm The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.  Lord of the Rings screenwriters Fran Walsh and Philippa Boyens (as well as Guilliermo Del Toro) join him in crafting its screenplay, practically guaranteeing a degree of continuity that might not have existed had Del Toro also directed.  With Howard Shore returning to score the prequel, the return of Sir Ian McKellen as Gandalf and Hugo Weaving as the Elf king Elrond—and, of course, Andy Serkis once again lending his motion capture talents Gollum, all should unfold beautifully.

Unfortunately, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey never lives up to either the majesty of its predecessor or the winsome manner of its source material.  It wants to; Jackson and company obviously so love Tolkien’s world that they decided to visit it again to tell Bilbo’s story, but in transferring the book to the screen somehow failed to remember their own lessons in adapting the previous movies.  The Lord of the Rings, seen in its totality, may stretch to twelve hours (depending on the versions you watch), yet each installment stays generally within the framework of the individual books.  By contrast, The Hobbit stretches its single tale into three movies (this is only part one), justifying its length by stuffing unnecessary characters and elements of The Simarillion into its 169-minute running time, making it feel far more like The Unexpurgated Journey.  One might be glad to once again see Cate Blanchett as Galadriel and Sir Christopher Lee’s Saruman again, but rather than provide the mystery and menace they brought to the previous trilogy, they instead sit in Rivendell with Elrond and Gandalf speaking in ominous tones of impending conflict.  It sounds as if it came from the blog of a Tolkien fanboy.

The screenplay covers the novel’s first third.  Bilbo (Martin Freeman) finds his everyday world in the Shire suddenly uprooted when Gandalf brings to his home a band of Dwarves led by Thorin Oakenshield (Richard Armitage), where they present him with a proposition: join them on their journey to the Lonely Mountain and help liberate Dwarven treasure stolen by the dragon Smaug, and they will give him a fourteenth of what they recoup.  Of course Bilbo resists at first, Hobbits not being great adventurers, yet of course he goes, encountering along the way a trio of hungry trolls, marauding orcs, and the warrens of a goblin kingdom.  Some sequences display incredible beauty; Jackson renders the goblin kingdom as a maze of stairs and platforms, while the latest CGI and 3D technology animates the movements and features of the goblins themselves.  The same could be said of every creature in The Hobbit—especially Gollum, now even more fully realized in the previous movies.  And yet the technology that perfectly details these creatures—specifically, a frame rate of 48 per second—also robs the movie of truly grand visuals.  Despite the clarity of the shots, too often The Hobbit looks like a BBC or PBS production cobbled together with the sensibilities of a big-budget blockbuster.  Though it works well in such moments as the riddle scene between Bilbo and Gollum (perhaps the movie’s highlight), too often it looks cheesy.

Jackson, too, appears to have fallen into the trap of filmmakers like Steven Spielberg and George Lucas in offering a good deal of action but at the expense of interesting characters.  Extending The Hobbit to three movies might have offered more depth to not only Bilbo but also Thorin, but what characteristics the screenwriters do fill in never rise beyond the level of the trite and routine.  Worse, Jackson drenches the movie with sentimentality, shooting scenes with such saccharine sweetness that the unwary multiplex patron might lose his foot to diabetes at the 90-minute mark.
But the biggest sin The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey commits is one involving history.  It’s been almost a decade since the release of The Return of the King.  Now we have not just a prequel but a prequel trilogy, causing one to remember not The Hobbit but another much-loved trilogy that saw the release of a prequel trilogy.  If The Lord of the Rings was Star Wars for a new generation of moviegoers, it’s hard not to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey as something very dire: Lord of the Rings: The Phantom Menace.

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John Carter[2012] HD Download

John Carter[2012] HD Download

Review: John Carter (2012)

It seems as though John Carter may end up disappointing the Disney folks. They obviously put a great deal of money into the production ($250,000,000 to be more exact) but will most likely see little return. It isn’t for lack of a good film; to the contrary, John Carter held my attention throughout, despite the 2 ½ hour running time and the complexity of the plot. The problem is that Carter will go up against The Lorax, which is expected to reel in parental dollars across the board; subsequently, this film will probably get left behind. Unfortunately, it’s too bad, because the originality here is staggering in a market that usually recycles older films for 3D. Speaking of which, Carter does have a 3D release, but I opted for good old fashioned 2D. I’ll explain why at the end.

There is no single way to follow this storyline; it comes at the viewer from different angles. Taylor Kitsch is John Carter, a Virginian and veteran of the Civil War whose outward appearance is like every other man in the late 19th century. Carter is suddenly and unexpectedly transported to Mars, a barren, clay-like planet with a vast landscape and widespread nothingness. Right away, this film exposes itself as something different. The Civil War? Virginia? Mars? These are worlds that don’t really belong together; one is historic, the other futuristic.  Carter quickly learns he can jump long distances, as if bouncing from an invisible trampoline. The new talent confuses him, but enthralls Tars Tarkas (Willem Dafoe), a tall, gangly creature who appears out of nowhere. Actually, Tars is but one of thousands of these creatures inhabiting the planet. They resemble turtles with elephant tusks, looming over the dusty terrain with weapons, and look upon Carter as a foreign entity. Despite Carter introducing himself as “John Carter, from Virginia,” Tars can only comprehend the latter half of the introduction and continues to call him “Virginia.” The only thing he wants “Virginia” to do is jump – jump high and far. Confused? I was too, at first.

After being carried back to their city, Carter is thrust into an alien world, increasingly frustrated by the odd language and archaic customs. Meanwhile, Sab Than (Dominic West) is the ruler of a neighboring city, guided by Matai Shang  (Mark Strong), a shape shifter who speaks softly and wears a massive robe. Sab is interested in power and control, and at the center of his plan for dominance is Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins), the Princess of Barsoom (Mars). Sab wants to marry Dejah; joining the two cities means Sab’s governance over everything. Dejah is, of course, repulsed by the prospect of marrying Sab, though her father Tardos Mors (Ciarán Hinds) essentially gives her away, lest he anger Sab and endanger the city. It appears as though Carter has survived one Civil War only to find himself in another, this time on a different planet with strange beings, human-like armies, flying ships, and a Colosseum-esque arena where insubordinate citizens are forced to defend themselves against giant white apes. Still confused? Don’t worry, you won’t be.
John Carter has a lot going for it. The film is full of rich visuals and high production value. The fictional Barsoom is brought to life so effectively that it no longer seems foreign; it feels like a place we could all visit if fate abruptly decided to teleport us. I would definitely visit if it were possible. I digress. Carter is a mixture of many different genres. It begins as a period piece, with an accurate depiction of postwar Virginia life, horses and carriages, rainy streets, and telegram offices. As soon as we’ve settled in and become comfortable, everything becomes science fiction – not cheesy science fiction with stereotypical UFOs and laser beams, but the kind of science fiction that a kid from the 1950s would read under his blanket with a flash light. John Carter would be the hero; Barsoom would be a real place, tucked away in the depths of imagination. Yes, Carter became that kind of science fiction, and I was promptly fixated. But that’s not all. There are comedic situations and dramatic scenes. All of the ingredients are in place and the film progressed nicely.

While I felt the acting was superb all around, I’ve also heard varying opinions. Many people are upset over Taylor Kitsch playing the lead role. Kitsch is relatively unknown, save for a successful run on TV’s Friday Night Lights. In fact, the projected failure of this film is already being blamed on Kitsch, which is a little ridiculous considering he did fine as the title character. The general consensus thinks that a really well-known actor could have made John Carter a box office smash. Really? Like who? Pitt? Clooney? Harrison Ford? None of them would fit. This is a unique film; had it been led by a superstar, I honestly think it would have lost something. Taylor Kitsch was a good choice, in my opinion, for what it’s worth. I also enjoyed Lynn Collins as Dejah. She is a princess without the prissiness of the rank, a tough acting, down-to-earth beauty who could easily prance around but prefers to fight. I’ve liked Dominic West since discovering him on The Wire, so it was nice to see him in a substantial role. His character was drunk with power and thirsty for more, but somehow, he wasn’t detestable. There was something likable about him, even though his quest for authority meant defeating the other leads. Mark Strong played villainous as he often does (Green Lantern, Kick Ass, Sherlock Holmes, etc…), though his Matai Shang was a little different. The character isn’t really….evil, per say, but rather authoritative and a bit devious. Strong plays it well (and looks three times bigger than he actually is).

John Carter is a good movie. I’m not worried about naysayers who can’t follow the unorthodox plot or theatergoers who expect Star Wars and leave disillusioned. I was glad to find a movie unlike something I’ve already seen. I appreciate the immense amount of work that went in to the set design, the clothing, and the appearance of an unknown world. I chose to see this film in 2D for a couple of reasons. First, I’m tired of everything being released in 3D. The novelty was fun as a kid in the 80s, but then Hollywood forgot about it until Avatar descended on us and set a new standard for surrealism. In wanting to keep up with the Camerons, every filmmaker began to release 3D “as you’ve never seen it.” Well, I have seen it and it’s beginning to lose its luster. Sometimes, I feel it is overcompensation for a weak plot. Secondly, wearing the glasses for over two hours is exhausting.
The film is based on the novel “A Princess of Mars,” written in 1917 by Edgar Rice Burroughs. Ten sequels were written to supplement the original novel, and it would stand to reason that John Carter may have sequels of its own to follow the storyline. But if the preliminary reports are any indication, our visit to Barsoom may sadly end here.

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Safe (2012) HD Download

 

Safe (2012) HD Download

Jason Statham cracks codes (and heads)

From the Transporter Trilogy to the Crank films and one-offs like The Mechanic, Death Race and Blitz, you know where you stand with Jason Statham. And, what’s more, he usually delivers. Put him together with Boaz Yakin, a writer-director who never quite fulfilled the early promise of his 1994 debut, Fresh, and the result is a surprisingly satisfying, box-ticking action thriller. 

It’s set in New York, where the safe in question contains $30 million, a booty that Chinese Triads, Russian Mafia and corrupt NYPD are all itching to get their hands on. The combination is currently stored in the head of Mei (Catherine Chan), a Chinese schoolgirl kidnapped and brought to Manhattan to work for old school Triad boss Uncle Han (James Hong) – primarily because her computer-like brain leaves no information trace. 
Meanwhile, Statham’s Luke Wright is a former cop-turned-cage fighter, getting pummelled every night to atone for his sins/give us some fisticuffs. A set of tragic/ contrived circumstances turn him suicidal; about to chuck himself under a subway train, he spies Mei, in flight from the Russians (who’ve just stolen her from the Chinese) and comes to the rescue. 

From here on, Luke finds a reason to live, protecting Mei and playing all three money-grabbing parties off each other. Luke’s friendship with the outspoken child may be as calculated as the villains are generic, but there’s no doubting the plot’s energy, careering around New York hotspots in a hail of gunfire (or, as Statham growls, “Been in restaurants all night – all I got served was lead”). 
Yakin proves he can handle action well – the hotel shoot-out is a stand-out but few of the set-pieces fail to combust. And Statham embraces his role with relish, dispatching bad guys with killer lines (“I never collected garbage, I disposed of it”) and deadly blows. It won’t change your life, but it will leave you charged.

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The Dictator (2012) HD Download

 

The Dictator (2012) HD Download

'The Dictator': Baron Cohen Still Rules

"Sacha Baron Cohen Gives Up" could be the alternate title for this somewhat slight but commendably brisk new comedy. His most popular self-determined movie comedies, 2006's "Borat" and 2009's "Bruno," had the chameleonic, vastly gifted performer, who's also a sharp satirist, donning outrageous character garb and traits and perpetuating alternately scripted and documentary-style acts of guerrilla comedy on unsuspecting real people, the better to make some plangent points. Now the inevitable has happened: Baron Cohen himself is too famous to really pull off putting his characters into the "real world" (as he inadvertently (or maybe not) demonstrated with his flop appearance at this year's Oscars, playing his character from this movie). And so "The Dictator" has him pulling off various outrageous antics in the movie world, and it's all the more focused and consistently funny for that.

Search: More on Sacha Baron Cohen | More on Anna Faris
Baron Cohen plays a dim, nasty Middle East strongman named Aladeen, whose vast wealth (plundered from the people of his fictional country, of course) allows him to bed down American starlets (Megan Fox makes a very good-sport cameo), pursue a nuclear program (the primary target of Baron Cohen's early jousts would seem to be Iran's goofy head of state, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad) and drive around in a motorcade of solid-gold Humvees. Soon he's advised by second-in-command (Ben Kingsley) to address the U.N. Once in the States, treachery rears its head, and Aladeen is presumed dead while an even more cretinous double (also Baron Cohen, duh) takes his place. Before Aladeen is waylaid and replaced, he finds plenty in our beloved country to complain about. Ensconced in a luxury hotel, he bitches, "Twenty dollars a day for Internet? What the f---? And they say I'm an international criminal!"

Interestingly, the people behind this scheme to have a dummy Aladeen declare "democracy" have even more nefarious aims in mind for their country than Aladeen once did. This weird gloss on the setup of Chaplin's ancient political parable "The Great Dictator" soon has the rude, crude but powerless Aladeen joining forces with a radical caterer (Anna Faris) and a nuke scientist he'd thought he'd had executed (Jason Mantzoukas).
The deglammed Faris is a target for a lot of Aladeen's incredibly crass and crude putdowns. Indeed, the volume of sophomoric humor here is pretty staggering, particularly considering the picture comes in at barely 90 minutes. But here Baron Cohen balances the stupid, outrageous, over-the-top stuff with almost, ahem, radically provocative observations and pronouncements, and tops the whole thing off with a speech that is a grandstand play in the same mode as the one that ended the aforementioned "Great Dictator," only quite a bit funnier and more unsettling.

A gaggle of great performers keeps things extra-engaging throughout; bathroom humor is always better in the capable hands of Sir Ben, to be sure, and John C. Reilly, Fred Armisen and a host of other luminaries bring their best bits. And while Faris' makeover isn't likely to excite fans of her in "The House Bunny" ("You call those breasts? I thought you were a boy!" Aladeen indignantly exclaims to her during a scooter ride when she asks him to take his hands off the mammaries), her work here is as good as any she's done in a while. We command you to see it!

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Ted (2012) HD Download

 

Ted (2012) HD Download

Seth MacFarlane, the mastermind behind Family Guy and American Dad ventures out from animated television into live action with his directorial debut feature film Ted. Never far from controversy, MacFarlane has seen his show's cancelled and restarted more than any other person in American television, yet one thing remains clear, he has a keen eye for the satirical, the cultural and, above all else, the socially inappropriate and with Ted, he doesn't hold back.
John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) is a 35-year-old man who still lives with Ted (MacFarlane) his childhood teddy bear, who was brought to life upon a wish 26 years earlier. John has been dating his girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) for 4 years, but their relationship begins to suffer because of the connection that John has with Ted. As John continues to try and fail to separate himself from Ted, his relationship suffers more and he is soon put into a position where he must decide whether to continue living with his best friend or the woman he loves.

The basic plot of Ted is reminiscent to a host of other films, notably Shaun of the Dead in a sub-genre of comedy known as the 'bromance.' The struggle of grown man-children to come to terms with the pressure to become adults, while fast becoming cliched, is mined successfully by MacFarlane and company for the majority of Ted. There are trademark Family Guy-esque flashbacks, pop culture references (Flash Gordon providing the majority of the real laughs) and some surprising and hilarious cameos from a variety of celebrities, including a truly hilarious opening and closing narration by Patrick Stewart.

Yet it relies on the chemistry between MacFarlane, Wahlberg and Kunis for it's success and in these three central characters it really finds its feet. Kunis is fast becoming one of the most likable female screen presences working today, while Wahlberg continues to prove a great knack for comedy performances, which far outshadow his often stumbling dramatic or action hero personas. But it is MacFarlane voicing Ted who is the real star of the show and with his incredibly recognisable style and delivery keeps the laughs coming. There are moments where the plot becomes baggy and misguided, like the secondary story involving Donny (Giovanni Ribisi) trying to kidnap Ted, but even this isn't without funny moments.

As with Family Guy, some of Ted's jokes miss the mark and while the final third descends into cliched boredom, there is more than enough cutting humour and 'offend-all-peoples' comedy to keep fans of his TV shows laughing all the way home. There is more close-to-the-bone commentary in this than any other comedy in the last decade, with constant jokes around racism, sexism and even 9/11. Yet under the sure guidance of the master of the inappropriate, Ted soars, even if it's prone to bouts of misfiring jokes. People who find his previous work offensive will find nothing new or comforting here. But for those who like MacFarlane's comedy, Ted is as rude, crude and thoroughly un-PC as anything he's done before and is the funniest comedy of 2012.

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